Author Topic: Murphy's Law - for Mechwarriors  (Read 2019 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline MekBeth

  • MechWarrior
  • **
  • Posts: 227
  • Karma: 31
  • "Just be nice" - God
Murphy's Law - for Mechwarriors
« on: April 22, 2010, 10:39:54 PM »
Hey Folks,
First post here so i thought of something worthy:

Murphy's Rules of Combat
(A comprehensive list obtained from various sources)

   1. If the enemy is in range, so are you.
   2. If you can see the enemy, they can see you.
   3. Incoming fire has the right of way.
   4. Friendly fire isn't.
   5. The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming friendly fire.
   6. Don't look conspicuous: it draws fire. This is why aircraft carriers are called bomb magnets.
   7. There is always a way.
   8. The easy way is always mined.
   9. Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo.
  10. Professionals are predictable, it's the amateurs that are dangerous.
  11. The enemy only attacks on one of two occasions: When you're ready for them, and when you're not ready for them.
  12. Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy someone else to shoot at.
  13. If you can't remember, the claymore is pointed at you.
  14. If your attack is going well, you have walked into an ambush.
  15. The enemy diversion you have been ignoring will be the main attack.
  16. Don't draw fire, it irritates the people around you.
  17. When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend.
  18. If it's stupid but works, then it isn't stupid.
  19. When in doubt empty the magazine.
  20. Never share a fox hole with anyone braver than you.
  21. Anything you do can get you shot. Including doing nothing.
  22. Make it too tough for the enemy to get in and you can't get out.
  23. Mines are equal opportunity weapons.
  24. A Purple Heart just proves that were you smart enough to think of a plan, stupid enough to try it, and lucky enough to survive.
  25. Don't ever be the first, don't ever be the last and don't ever volunteer to do anything.
  26. The quartermaster has only two sizes: too large and too small.
  27. Five second fuses only last three seconds.
  28. It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.
  29. A "sucking chest wound" is nature's way of telling you to slow down.
  30. If you're short of everything but the enemy, you're in a combat zone.
  31. When you have secured an area, don't forget to tell the enemy.
  32. Never forget that your weapon is made by the lowest bidder.
  33. You are not a superman.
  34. No plan survives the first contact intact.
  35. If you are forward of your position the artillery will always fall short.
  36. The important things are always simple.
  37. The simple things are always hard.
  38. No combat ready unit ever passed inspection.
  39. Beer math: two beers times 37 men equal 49 cases.
  40. Body count math: two guerrillas plus one portable plus two pigs equals 37 enemy KIA.
  41. Things that must be together to work usually can't be shipped together.
  42. Radios will fail as soon as you desperately need fire support.
  43. Tracers work both ways.
  44. If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will have more than your fair share of objectives to take.
  45. When both sides are convinced that they are about to lose, they are both right.
  46. If it moves, shoot it.
  47. If it doesn't move, poke it with your gun barrel and then shoot it.
  48. Overkill works.
  49. Murphy was a grunt.
(Taken from http://www.heavymetalpro.com/MurphysRules.htm )

Yes, it was written for Classic Battletech. And yes, it really brightened up my day.  ;D

cy
It's Battletech - not Logitech


Lyran Assault Scout Headbangers

Offline MaverickOriginal

  • Recruit
  • *
  • Posts: 155
  • Karma: 8
Re: Murphy's Law - for Mechwarriors
« Reply #1 on: April 22, 2010, 10:47:34 PM »
I'll follow that all up with a: "No plan is fool proof to a sufficiently talented fool."
Deforesting clearcut since Dec 26 2009.

Offline MekBeth

  • MechWarrior
  • **
  • Posts: 227
  • Karma: 31
  • "Just be nice" - God
Re: Murphy's Law - for Mechwarriors
« Reply #2 on: April 22, 2010, 10:52:07 PM »
So make it number 50.
It's Battletech - not Logitech


Lyran Assault Scout Headbangers

Offline EagleFire

  • Lance Sergeant
  • **
  • Posts: 422
  • Karma: 17
Re: Murphy's Law - for Mechwarriors
« Reply #3 on: April 22, 2010, 11:27:09 PM »
Here's some others I know.

Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is
cheap. Life is expensive.

Always cheat; always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.

If you are not shooting, you should be communicating your intention to shoot.


Offline SmuttyChiken

  • Bondsman
  • *
  • Posts: 44
  • Karma: 0
  • Chiken Confederation
    • Chiken Confederation
Re: Murphy's Law - for Mechwarriors
« Reply #4 on: April 22, 2010, 11:48:28 PM »
Murphy's Law is "What can go wrong will go wrong" ...

Murphy's Rules of Combat is not written for MechWarrior but as a tongue in cheek look at real life combat (if you bend the modern rules of combat that are applied in war zones of today) ... Most of the rules are true ... 46 and 47 could end you in hot water ...

I can remember reading these rules when I was but a young lance-corporal, now that is a while ago and well before Mechwarrior was around ...

Of course you can apply the rules to pretend combat such as Mechwarrior ...

Now carry on ...

Offline ~SJ~ Razorin

  • Bondsman
  • *
  • Posts: 39
  • Karma: 3
  • SpiderCat
Re: Murphy's Law - for Mechwarriors
« Reply #5 on: April 23, 2010, 12:09:53 AM »
...
Rule n°75 : If you shot down a 'mech near your hangar, it WILL go crit.
Rule n°76 : Same goes for downing a mech near a Friendly BA squad...

Offline CHHs Colt - Caleb - Rock

  • Bondsman
  • *
  • Posts: 21
  • Karma: 0
Re: Murphy's Law - for Mechwarriors
« Reply #6 on: April 23, 2010, 12:37:55 AM »
Not Sure These Fits, But I Still Like Them:

"Retreat, h3l we just got here!"
~ Captain Lloyd Williams, USMC at the Battle of Belleau Wood WWI

"We're surrounded? Good, now we can kill the b@$t@rds in any direction."
~ Colonel Lewis B. "Chesty" Puller; Korean War

"We're surrounded. That simplifies the problem!"
CHESTY PULLER, USMC

"Sometimes it is entirely appropriate to kill a fly with a sledge-hammer!"
MAJ. HOLDREDGE

Offline MekBeth

  • MechWarrior
  • **
  • Posts: 227
  • Karma: 31
  • "Just be nice" - God
Re: Murphy's Law - for Mechwarriors
« Reply #7 on: April 23, 2010, 01:29:30 AM »
@SmuttyChiken. Thx. didn't know that and trustet my source.
But they fit somehow, don't they?

P.S. You have been a Lance Corporal before Battletech was released? Before 1980 (that was when Jordan Weisman foundet FASA?) :)
It's Battletech - not Logitech


Lyran Assault Scout Headbangers

Offline DruidChiken

  • MechWarrior
  • **
  • Posts: 272
  • Karma: 1
  • Bawkin' @ ya
    • Chiken Confederation
Re: Murphy's Law - for Mechwarriors
« Reply #8 on: April 23, 2010, 02:01:29 AM »
@SmuttyChiken. Thx. didn't know that and trustet my source.
But they fit somehow, don't they?

P.S. You have been a Lance Corporal before Battletech was released? Before 1980 (that was when Jordan Weisman foundet FASA?) :)

Yeh Smutty is older than dirt lol


Spreading the Bawk! to the world... One game at a time
Unit Lead MWL
Mechstorm MW4 HDP Team

Offline Makaan

  • Recruit
  • *
  • Posts: 125
  • Karma: 1
  • Destroying your mechs with da spoon
Re: Murphy's Law - for Mechwarriors
« Reply #9 on: April 23, 2010, 06:13:08 AM »
When Atlas sees you. Run.

Offline (TLL)Sky_walker

  • Living Legend
  • *******
  • Posts: 2638
  • Karma: 65
  • Close Range Attack Forces
    • MWLL Wiki
Re: Murphy's Law - for Mechwarriors
« Reply #10 on: April 23, 2010, 09:28:51 AM »
When you see someone running - atlas him.
:P
MWLL Wiki Newsletter: Wiki suffers from spammers and lack of activity - change it now, jump in and contribute with something useful! :D


Proud to be C.R.A.P. inspiration # MWLL Wiki Admin # MWLL Alpha Tester # Dev Team # MWLL Defense Force Mercenary - Battlemech Barracks

Offline Ogliss

  • Bondsman
  • *
  • Posts: 1
  • Karma: 0
Re: Murphy's Law - for Mechwarriors
« Reply #11 on: May 14, 2010, 12:27:59 PM »
when you see someone atlasing someone, LRM him in the back!

Offline HAARP

  • Living Legend
  • *******
  • Posts: 2215
  • Karma: 186
  • = Clan Jade Wolf =
    • Clan Jade Wolf
Re: Murphy's Law - for Mechwarriors
« Reply #12 on: May 14, 2010, 12:47:32 PM »
When you see a boat, get below 300m of them and watch them run helplessly towards their base.

Offline Jaso the Sniper

  • Lance Sergeant
  • **
  • Posts: 391
  • Karma: 4
Re: Murphy's Law - for Mechwarriors
« Reply #13 on: May 16, 2010, 06:51:39 PM »
A. If you see an area in combat, put mines on it.
B. If you see an area far from combat, put mines on it.

... at least for me, anyway...
People are stupid if they think they can have their own way.

... that is, unless they have HEAP rounds, high-explosive homing missiles, and terawatt lasers on a walking weapons platform, that is...

Offline Sesambrot

  • MWLL Developer
  • Star Colonel
  • *
  • Posts: 1399
  • Karma: 62
  • What would a pirate do?
Re: Murphy's Law - for Mechwarriors
« Reply #14 on: May 16, 2010, 07:30:08 PM »
from my own experience:

When piloting the biggest and best armored mech on the field, expect to be the target of any enemy in range.
If at first you don't succeed try again, and if you don't try again, you'll be hit in the face with a shovel!
"I'm a piece of C.R.A.P."